A More Beautiful You

Often, I look in the mirror. I don't like what I see most of the time. That's just me being purely honest. So much of the time I feel like blemish, like God messed up on me or something. I have blemishes on my face, I could lose a few pounds and get in shape, my hair never looks right...and I could go on. I look at myself and say, "Ew - I am disgusting. What happened?"

If you haven't seen the "Voyage of the Dawn Treader." I would encourage you to watch it. It was my favorite book out of the Chronicles of Narnia and the movie was great too. Honestly, a part of the story really convicted me. It was when the main character Lucy, was looking in a mirror that was on a page of a book of spells. It said, "An infallible spell to make you she, the beauty you've always wanted to be." When Lucy looked into that mirror - her face transformed into her older sister, Susan's. Lucy thought that the mirror had made her beautiful and she felt good about herself when she looked into that mirror. So she tore the page out and looked into it all the time. It consumed her.

At this point in the movie, I had thought about all the girls who I have wished I could look like - one being my OWN older sister. How much time have I spent worrying about my own little problems and wishing that I could look like someone else? 

Later, Aslan let Lucy see what it would be like if she really were Susan and the simple fact was - there would be no Lucy. None. And Narnia wouldn't have come into their lives because Lucy was the one who discovered it.

It's okay for women to want to be beautiful. I think a Proverbs 31 will be beautiful. She will take care of herself and be beautiful in her own unique way. Even the Bible acknowledges that women are gorgeous creature full of grace. So it's okay to want to look good. I want to smell pretty so I get spray that will make me smell nice and I use hair-spray in my hair. That's good. I think it's feminine to be considerate of your appearance. But we come to a point where this "lust for beauty" is overcoming us. I know it has me, at least. I am constantly facing pressures to be the "hottest one out there". Porn, latest styles, TV, magazines and care-products are all saying, "You have to be the best. You have to be the one to get the cat-calls. You have to be the one the men drool over. You have to be the one every girl is jealous of. Look like this...or her...or them..."

It's overwhelming.

No. Simply no.

When I fussing at myself, it doesn't help when someone laughs and says, "Beauty isn't what matters." Because I know that, but it's still hard. The only thing that has really helped me with this problem is this verse - one of my favorites.

Song of Solomon 4:7 "All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you."

The sound like the words of a man madly in love with a woman. They are. Do you realize that someone is madly in love with you? I have proof! He told me He was! Ladies, Song of Solomon is a love letter from God to His people. With one "glance, we ravish His heart." God is pleased with us. He calls us to come and be alone with Him.

Yes, outward beauty is perishing and it isn't key in our lives, but you are beautiful.

When was the last time someone told you that and really meant it, not just saying to to clear your mind? Well, I'm saying it to you now and I have NO CLUE what you may look like.

You are beautiful. Your eyes. Your soft hair. The way you smile. Your hands. You're beautiful! If you don't believe me. Take it from the Big Guy. He says it in Song of Solomon several times. Write SOS 4:7 on your mirror. Read it and highlight it in your Bible.

I'm ashamed to say that I've wasted time envying other girls. Like Lucy, don't wish yourself to look like someone else. Because then there wouldn't be a you and there could never be a more beautiful you.

Ya know, the thought occurred to me one day that God isn't up in heaven looking down on me saying, "Whew! What was I thinking? Man, I sure messed up on that one!!" God doesn't make mistakes. That's a comforting thought.

There is a song that I really like by Johnny Diaz. Listen to it. It's got great words.



I will hopefully have at least one more post about this soon.

Dancing Solo - And Loving Every Minute

She comes home from work. Butterflies are in her stomach. She has told herself a thousand times not to hope to much, but it hasn't worked. Valentines Day is a day when a lot of people reveal their true feelings about each other. Although she tried not to, she dreamed about a special letter coming in the mail. One confessing affection....even if it was a secret admirer. Just to know that someone thought she was special - would be enough.

She pulls into the driveway and parks. Then jogs across the road to retrieve her mail. Her hand hovers over the lid of the mailbox and she prays. "Please...let there be something. I need to know that someone thinks I'm special."

She grips the mail and pulls it out. Right there, she flipped through the mail.

Nothing but bills and advertisements.

She shuffles back to the car. She isn't one to be negative but she mutters to herself, "Another Valentine's Day and I'm still a nobody to everyone."

Valentines Day is hard for singles. Especially if your the hard-core romantic, dreamer type (like me. :D). I dream of having a guy head over heals for me. What a special thing that will be. And Valentines just seems like the perfect day to start a relationship and be in love. So many people are, everyone but yourself it feels like. No fair. Why is it always me, right?

She plops onto her couch and stares at the ceiling. She feels like nothing will ever change and her mind wonders off to a handsome man of her imagination and wonders if he exists. Is she always going to be like this? Is anyone ever going to love her?

She fights angry tears. She is mad. Mad at herself for being so boring and plain. Mad that she - Her thought gets cut off by something on her dresser. She walks over. A single rose and a worn piece of paper lie there. The paper simply reads, "I love you and that's all that matters. Wait. With love, Your Father"

I think sometimes we forget that this time in our lives is a growing period and many times significant interest in the opposite sex will only distract us. I know I forget that right now, I'm the center of Christ's affection and that's all that matters. And He needs to be the center of MY affection. No one else. If we are striving to be men and women of the Lord, then the best thing we can do is be happy where he has placed us. And you know, there is a lot of things you can do as a single person that you won't be able to do as a married one. So take advantage! Don't let those opportunities pass you. You are preparing for the rest of your life - now, so act like it. If you are single, then blossom as a single person.

Sometimes, i think of it this way. A dancer can dance beautifully with someone else. Dances between a man and a woman (especially on ice) are so beautiful. They can do some really cool things together. But think about it, they have to work together and maybe not do the dance the way they would like because they have to gel with that other person. But, a solo dancer can do some really incredible things too. He or she doesn't have to worry about messing up or being out of time with each other. They can do the dance from their hearts and let it take them wherever.

We should look at our singleness like that. No telling where God is going to take us, so just dance your dance with all the heart you can muster and let God. He is going to bring someone else on the stage soon enough. Until then, choreograph your routines, practice your jumps, and be creative with your path and enjoy it! You won't be a soloist again (Unless there is a tragedy but lets not think about that because it will depress this post.).

Right now, we have one person to dance for. Christ.

Yeah, it's going to be disappointing when Monday comes and goes with no special card or chocolate, but let's strive to think about God's huge love for us and be inspired. 

A "Lovizzle-Comment-Inspired" P31W Post!!!

People, this is why I love feedback on my posts. If you don't agree, or having something to add, correct or can offer a different view, I want to hear about it. Things (especially in the Bible) aren't always so black and white. We often had to scratch our heads and wonder "What in the world?" And other Christians have better insight than me a lot of times (or most of the time. :D I'm glad for that though). I was so happy because a fellow blogger, LoVizzle, left a really awesome comment on one of my posts that provoked a lot of thought in my mind and offered a great way to look at a verse. He's got a great blog, btw...check it out. Letters From LoVizzle

We are trying to learn about the Proverbs 31 Woman and were looking at verse 11 that says, "He has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value." 

LoVizzle brought a great thought about it. Here's what he said. "From a guy's standpoint, I had always seen that verse as talking about the man. The new NIV says, "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value." In order to grasp what we're dealing with, this sentence can be broken down to "Her husband lacks nothing of value." I guess it could be saying that her husband has her to value (which is true, remembering the previous verse about rubies!). But I think this one is about the husband, which means the verse is saying that a "wife of noble character" will have a great, awesome husband. Think about how true that is: Have you ever seen an amazing woman marry a scumbag, drug-dealer, or lowlife? No! Any wise, noble, trustworthy, pure, intelligent, loving, kind, valuable woman would want to marry the cream of the crop, right? That's the only thing that makes sense to me. I don't see a P31W falling in love with a drunkard, jerk, abusive man. I see P31Ws falling in love with loving, selfless, strong (yet sensitive), determined, trustworthy, righteous, pure, wise man of integrity. I think that's what it means."

I think that is really good application to that verse. So, that holds a lot of value for the girls and the guys. Girls, I know, I do it too, but we often freak out over guys that in reality, would not make good husbands. We are not supposed to play with hearts and if we aren't looking at someone as a potential marriage partner, then we don't need to be in relationships (well, deeper than friendship anyways) with them. That's hard to hear, but think about it: Life is not about seeing how many guys we can be in a relationship with, but rather to save our whole hearts for that special someone. So I believe its important to KNOW what we want to see in a guy. What is important for YOU to see in a husband? I was challenged to make a list of those things by Dannah Gresh in "The Bride Wore White." She said, "If you aim at nothing, you'll hit it." Know what you want in a husband, not a boyfriend, and only  look into guys like that for potential husbands. (And this is for girls ready for that, unlike me. I need some time being single.) Actually, between us, it can be kinda fun looking at guys' character. DISCLAIMER: This does not mean to judge the guys, by any means. We aren't called to judge anyone. And it doesn't mean if they are lacking in one area that we scratch them off the list (because time changes people - whaddaya know?)  It also doesn't mean that we shouldn't invest any time in the "not perfect guys" because you will live a guy-less life until you die at age 1,000 if you do. And this ALSO doesn't mean that every guy who shows potential you should hear "wedding bells" about, either. God knows who that man in your life is going to be, so you don't have to worry. I'm just encouraging you girls not to date someone you wouldn't marry. 

Okay, now about the guys. *evil glares* There is a lot I could say right now, but I'll refrain. Lol. I do want to briefly want to say a few things that are great to see in a guy, but I'll make it brief. You boys should learn from other boys, not girls. But I'll name a few things that I feel like is so lacking in the world of Christian men and all girls wish to see.

Be leaders. Please, be leaders. Don't wait for a girl to volunteer to pray, be the one to help out with a project, be the one to encourage others in the Lord. Sadly, I know so many more girls like that than guys. A bunch of people complain about how girls are taking over, but I can't help but think, "I agree, but the guys have let it happen..."

Spur Godly convos. I'm telling ya. You want a Christian girl to turn her head? Having the confidence to talk about Christ, your weaknesses, and life (deeper than ESPN, which girls totally don't care about) is something a lot of guys miss.

Watch your mouth. When a guy can go without being negative of other people, or saying something perverted, or being disrespectful...I'm impressed. The Bible says that the tongue is a bridle for the whole body. If you learn to direct it, it will change your life. THAT'S SO COOL!!

I'll stop there. EDIT: I realized this may sound brutal on you guys. I don't mean for it to be. We are truly appreciative of Godly men and I know many who are such an inspiration to me. Just thought I'd clear that up.

LoVizzle, thanks so much for "inspiring" this post, and thanks for being so faithful to read my posts and give great feedback!!!

Can You Believe This Snow?!?!

Live feed from the Jones' front porch. Someone's truck and trailer jack knifed in the middle of the road and people are stuck in front of our house. It's been like this for almost two hours. Poor people.

Snow is beautiful and dangerous. Be careful on the road, but don't forget to be amazed at the creativity of our Father and praise Him for His acts.

My Confession

Whoa. I had one crazy day. It was about a 12 hour day. I'm exhausted. But, instead of going to bed, which would be the sensible thing to do, I'm going to bore you all with the news about my day and confess something depressing.

I was not a Proverbs 31 Woman today...more specifically, this evening.

To start at the beginning, I had classes today and was at school for a really long time. Then, I got on the fun bus with Mr. Counts. Very fun, but terrifying experience. He makes me nervous driving. He...well, I won't say just in case any parents read this blog. I wouldn't want to tarnish his reputation. *laughs* He is so cool.

Here is a picture of him driving. This is about reality folks. Really. Lol. Oh yeah, speaking of freaky pictures. Her is one Becca took of me this morning. I try not to be embarrassed about bad pictures of me, so I'm going to share it, solely because it is SO funny, because this is what I look like probably most of the time: mouth slightly ajar and confused. I laughed hysterically when I saw it. Lol. It's good and freeing to be able to laugh at yourself. FOR REAL, I'm confused all the time. I really try not to be, but I just feel like I'm the last person to get the memo. Do you ever feel like that? Okay, WOW! I'm off track.

About the basketball game. We played, well, I'll save the team name, and I did the stats with my bestie, Carlee. Well, I'm not very good at stats anyways, because, I've never done points, I mainly just do fouls and "unofficial" stats. It's lame. I love it, but the full version, totally threw me off, not to mention that these refs weren't coming to the center to tell the table about fouls - they were calling it from the other side of the court and BOTH coaches were standing, so I could not see either of the refs at all. First quarter, I was a little bit behind. I was short two or three fouls for the other team. I didn't know who did them. So, I asked the other guys keeping stats. It  was stressful.

They told me, but come the end of the third quarter, they told Mr. Counts (team coach) that Iain, our starter (and one of the best, at that) FOULED OUT! And of course, Mr. C is freaking out and wondering why we didn't tell him that Iain had four fouls? And I said, "NO! NO he hasn't. He has three fouls."

Well, the other guys pulled a card and kinda used it against me about how I wasn't "keeping fouls for the whole first quarter", which maybe I AM bad, but that's overkill. Well, coaches and refs started yelling and I felt bad, like it was my fault because they BENCHED IAIN! And I was stressed because if I hadn't asked the dude for his foul record, then if wouldn't have happened. This would not have been as big a deal if the game wasn't so close and so intense as it was. It was very close. 

Anyways. As you can probably imagine, I was very stressed and VERY irritated/annoyed/mad/sad. Well, we ended up winning by a few points, and it turns out that both stats people were wrong. He didn't have three or five. He had four. *shrug*

I went into my game a little out of sorts, and it didn't help when I realized that team we were getting ready to play the Goliath descendants. Lol. No, they weren't that bad, just very good and extremely well coached. Anyways, I don't think my attitude was that of a Proverbs 31 Woman, and I know that I wasn't encouraging to my team when they needed it most. I hate it when I do that. I just want to punch myself square in the face. Because that verse comes to mind - always too late it feels like - "For whatever you do, do ALL unto the glory of God." I had to ask myself, "Was my attitude God glorifying?" And, no, it was not.

Luckily, toward the end of the game, I was more chilled (but still irked at the refs because they weren't calling anything). And lets not even mention the score. LOL! They KILLED US! No mercy. Trampled us into the hardwood floor. But, it was all good.

I get annoyed with myself when I am not the example for Christ that I should be, but I'm glad that He is a God of forgiveness and never-ending chances and renewed mercies. Like they say, "Live and learn."  

I'm living and never failing to learn. Sorry, to any of you who had to witness my madness, I'll try to do better next time. Feel free to remind me at the next game if you happen to think about it.

I'll say though, I play better when I'm mad, I must'a had at least three fouls. Someone said four. :p

P31W: He Will Have No Lack of Gain

Today, the Proverbs 31 Teens of the world tackle a challenging (at least for me) phrase. Let's read it.

NKJV - Proverbs 31:11b "So he will have no lack of gain." 

WHAT IN THE WORLD? Okay, I'm sorry, maybe this is just a dumb thing, but I cannot wrap my mind around the "lack" of "gain" thing at all. Every time I try to break that down in my mind, something happens and I fail and end up horribly confused. I'm pretty hard core in love with NKJV, but today, I will venture out into new horizons.

KJV "And he shall have no need of spoil." 

NASB "And he will have no lack of gain."

Hmm. This is interesting. It's my language. I like it. NLV "And she will greatly enrich his life."

NIV "He lacks nothing of value." 

Much better.I totally understand what that means now. Remembering that we are breaking down the qualities of a Proverbs 31 Woman, this verse makes lots of since. Especially in light of the phrase before it, "The heart of her husband safely trusts in her."

When I picture someone having no "lack of gain" or "lacking nothing of value", I think of someone with great prestige and wealth and riches and stuff. But I don't think this is what this verse means. The Bible has said many places that the most important things don't have anything to do with prosperity, but rather they have to do with the state of our hearts and how much we love God.

Now, isn't that interesting? If we are trustworthy women (see previous posts), then the people we are intimately related with aren't going to be lacking. I thought about this for a while. What about that Bible verse, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17

We say, "Ugh, being a trustworthy P31W is a really hard task. What is the benefit?" Here is one practical reward. If we are trustworthy, people around us are going to trust us and be affected by our actions. According to this verse, in our married lives, being trustworthy with our husbands, is going to supply him with much!! That really shows how valuable a P31W really is. Not only is she rare, but she supplies good things to her husband.  A good place to start being trustworthy and seeing those benefits is right now, right here.  

That's all I got on that phrase. Sorry, laaame. Interesting to think about, but kinda hard to explain. Tell me your thoughts and let me know if I missed the mark! I'd love to hear them. I know you guys will have better insight than me.

Check Out a Friends Blog!!

Hey, a friend of mine just started blogging! He's got some really awesome stuff so far. Let's give him some encouragement and subscribe? Okay? Okay!!

Jonny's Blog

DUDE! I found these on YOUTUBE!! This is our large and small ensemble at UCA! We competed and got first place. Wow. We aren't that bad (but we have a good teacher)... Not that I'm bragging. I'm having a really hard time not critiquing everything. Like the sopranos are NOT together (my section)... Enjoy!

HAHAHAHA!!! We all look mad. We have sang this 500 times and you can tell by our faces. good thing you can't see me!!!

Trustworthy P31W: On Gossip and Slander

(Wow. My fingers feel so weird. I've been playing guitar for two hours and I am not a guitar player. Ow!)

If you have some delusional thought in your mind that gossiping and slander isn't going to be judged harshly by God - then ditch that thought, right now.  Read these next few verses. Don't think God is serious when He says bridle your tongue?

James 3:2-10 "For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. ..."

1 Peter 3:10 "For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.""

James 1:26 "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless."
 
Wow.

Matthew 12:37 "I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” 

There are many more I could add, but I didn't want to make this post too long. Man, these Scriptures speak for themselves though, majorly. If we want to be Proverbs 31 Women, then on thing we must must learn is how to control our tongue and we must have knowledge of what type of power lies in our words. Proverbs 12:18 says, "There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." According to this verse, our tongue holds the power of life and death (Also see Proverbs 18:21). We can tear someone down or build him up, heal her or make her sick.

Skipping ahead in the chapter, Proverbs 31 tells us, "She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue." If we want to be P31W we have to put this into practice in our lives and constantly evaluate what exactly is on our tongues. I know that I'm often found with slander and gossip on mine. What about you? Let's get honest with ourselves and really think about this. Don't try to down-play your problem in your head if you have one. Many girls, and guys too, have a problem with slander and gossip and forget that the power of life and death is on our lips. We forget that one day we will have to stand before heaven one day and account for it. So what is gossip and what is slander? 

Gossip: According to Google, gossip means "a report (often malicious) about the behavior of other people". And that is exactly what it is. "Hey, Sally, did you see how Jack and Jill just hung all over each other at...blah blah blah?" Yep, that's gossip.

Let's think about it this way. If we are striving to be Christ-like then we are going to be doing the best good for the most people and constantly be pointing them to Christ by our words, actions and deeds. When I say, "Hey Sally, guess what?" Who is benefiting? Who is being uplifted and encouraged by my words. Yes, Sally may know a little more than she did before, but at who's expense? Jack and Jill's. Whether we admit it or not, people we talk to are affected by our reports. Sally is not going to feel the same way about Jack and Jill after I tell her what I saw. Ephesians 4:29 puts it simply in one sentence, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."  Before we speak, we have to ask ourselves. WHY am I saying this? WHO will benefit from this? And HOW can I be a light for Jesus Christ?

Slander: According to Google, (good ol' Google), Slander is an abusive attack on someones character or name. Basically, words said with the intent of hurting someone. This could range to a lot of things. Starting rumors, talking behind someone's back, or even something as seemingly small as being discouraging to someone.

I think slander comes from a deep place in our hearts. Most of the slandering that happens, comes from very insecure people. I think that (and I've felt and done this before to, I'm ashamed to say) when we slander others, we do it so we can stand higher. I've heard someone say it in a very understandable way. To paraphrase: We beat each other down with our words so we can step on their carcasses and stand higher. We want to be noticed, so we make sure that everyone around us, looks like nothing compared. I once heard a story about a man, who owned a company and he wanted to look handsome, so he employed the nastiest, ugliest people he could so that he would look like a model. I think this is kinda the same thing. We want to be heard, noticed, appreciated and pat on the back for being such a good kid...so what's better than making other people look bad, right? No, ladies. This is not the answer.

Once again, we will give an account for every idle word we speak.

So, you want to be a Proverbs 31 Woman? She is a woman who encouraged and spoke words of wisdom. She builds others up and stands up for her friends. She is a woman you can trust, because she will never speak an unkind word about anyone. She will never beat people down. When she speaks, people hear the Love of the Father in her mouth. You want to be a Proverbs 31 Woman? I do. I never will be, but I can try.

A Practical First Step: So yeah, we DO want to be P31W, but how do we do that when it seems like we can't even go in the bathroom at school with out someone saying,"Guess what?" Well, I have an idea. Whether it will work or not, I'm not sure. But we can try it. (I can't remember if I got this idea from someone else or if I thought it up? I'd like to think I did, but, oh well! Maybe it was Carlee who told me. I give her credit for all my good ideas, because she is the second half of my brain that I lost a while back...) I just put a rubber-band around my wrist. Not a hair-tie. A rubber band. For the next 30 days, I am going to purpose to not say a negative word about anyone, UNLESS asked by an adult with good intentions, someone is endangered, or it is mutually helpful to that person (like pointing out some areas people could do better in their dialogs. I have to do that.). And any time I forget and break that resolve, then I will snap that rubber band on my hand and stop talking, even if that means stopping mid-sentence.

Bathe this endeavor in prayer. Pray that God will cleanse you and put His words in our mouths instead. Will it be easy? NO! We're girls, of course not. So, get an accountability partner and have them do it with you. Maybe they will snap it for you when you forget. Hey, that'd be cool. Hopefully, after the 30 days, we will be trained not to speak a word of evil. Through this time, meditate on verses about our tongues and be thinking of ways we can intentionally build someone up!! Hows that for a reverse? 

Listen to your conscience, girls! If there is this part of you that says, "Perhaps, I shouldn't say this. DON'T!" You conscience is a gift that often (not always, though) will keep you our of trouble. If you feel something trying to stop you from speaking, then don't say anything. Our conscience is one way that God uses to teach us. It's your conscience that is going to remind you mid-sentence about the rubber-band on your arm. Rejoice that God has given you something that is constantly made more like His mind, so you can think clearer and make better decisions.

I'm glad I wrote on this topic. The Lord has used His Word to convict me and I'm looking forward to this crazy challenge. I'm praying for all of you girls (OR GUYS WHO MAY WANT TO JOIN US *HINT HINT* lol.). 

Psalm 141:3 "Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!" 

An Opportunity to Give Back to God

Hi everyone,

These are the testimonies of people who have been blessed by the scholarship program at Camp Barnabas.

"I cannot tell you what the scholarship funds mean to our family, without them camp would not be possible. Camp is the one week that my husband and I have a chance to focus on our relationship, it means so much to us to have this week. Because of our child’s illness, I cannot work. I provide care for her constantly but, thanks to the scholarship fund, we get to give our daughter a wonderful week at camp and our marriage a recharge. Thanks so much for the help.”  - A mother of a special girl with a rare genetic disorder
"Camp is the best week of my life. I realized at camp that God really does love me just the way I am and I want to go and tell everyone about God and my relationship with Him, but I think I am too shy. I am so thankful you have a scholarship fund that helps me be able to attend camp, it is the best place in the world, I think maybe it is a lot like heaven.”  - Ashley (young camper with spina bifida)

I am helping an organization called Camp Barnabas raise money for their camper scholarship program. Camp Barnabas provides life-changing opportunities for people with special needs and chronic diseases in a summer camp setting. These incredible people learn that they are uniquely created with abilities as they enjoy swimming, canoeing, horseback riding and lots of summertime fun.

More than 60% of the people who come to camp receive at least a partial scholarship. No one has ever been turned away from camp because of a financial need and it takes over $300,000 to make that possible.

I'd like to be able to count on you to make a donation to the organization so that I can help them fulfill their mission. So visit my website!! http://campbarnabas.donorpages.com/PersonalDonorPagesforCamperScholarshipFund/AshleyJones

Giving is easy! Simply click on my Fundraising Site address below to visit my personal fundraising page. You can read more about what we do here as well as make a secure donation online.

Thank you for your support! God is using your financial gifts to change lives! Please forward this message!

Ashley Jones

(Email me with any questions: faraboverubiesatattdotnet)

My Fundraising Site:

http://campbarnabas.donorpages.com/PersonalDonorPagesforCamperScholarshipFund/AshleyJones

More On A Trustworthy P31W

This is a continuation of the post below. It was long and a little hefty, I decided to break it apart. Here's this post. Be expecting more, soon!

Keeping Your Promises: His heart trusts her. He KNOWS that when she says she'll do something she will. This hits home for me, because I have the WORST memory. It's bad. I can't remember how old my friends are, what I ate for breakfast or what day it is. So it is very easy for me to forget to do what I say. Mom says, "Ash, do thus and so for me." No prob, I don't mind helping her. I reassure her that it will be done....right after I'm done with what I'm doing at the moment...which could take a while. Two hours later mom comes to me and says, "Ash tell me you did thus and so." I freeze. HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN?!?!?! I meant to do it, I really did. I often wonder how the P31W would handle things like this. I imagine that she would write herself and note to remind herself, or do it right then and there.

Their hearts trust her. They KNOW that when she says she'll do something, she will.

Keeping Secrets:You promise Sally you will not tell a soul what she told you about her family, but Jack and Jill were pressuring you, so you gave in and told them. She'll never know you told.  The P31W would seal her lips. When people confide in her, they know that she will never tell anyone because she cares about them. Guys, really. Don't tell other people's secrets. Think about how you would feel and try to live by the golden rule. The Bible says, "Love your neighbor as yourself." In the case of telling others' secrets, I believe it boils down to how much you care about other people. You say, "I love people." but then blab their secrets? Hm. Not very P31W-ish to me. This is hard for us girls, I know. It's just irresistible to tell Jack and Jill about Sally's insecurity issues, but don't do it. Again, we have to remember that we will give an account for every idle word we speak. Hearts trust her. They know that when she says something, she will do it. If she says, "I won't tell" or "I'll get it done." She will. I want to have that reputation. To the point that if someone needs someone to talk to, they will KNOW that they can come to ME because there is not ONE DOUBT in their mind that I will keep their secrets and care for them.

Following Through: This section would be similar to keeping your promises. If you say, I'm going to do this. Do it! Don't get half way into a project and stop. The P31W makes a decision and perseveres through it.

If we want to be trust worthy, I believe that one thing we have to think about constantly is Matthew 12:36 "But I tell you that men will have to give an account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken."

I have more on this topic of trustworthiness, but I'll have to post on that at a later time. It's LATE! In the meantime, if you have any elaborations on this, comments, or extra thoughts, even tips on how to make my writing better...please share.

Haha, it's funny. I'm doing this thing on Proverbs 31 Women and most of my readers are guys. Lol.

A Trustworthy P31W

Oh, I really don't feel like posting right now. There are a bajillion things on my mind and I feel like I'm going crazy. Actually, I'll admit that I'm having a hard time trusting the Lord right now, so please, please pray for me. In the meantime, I'm going to post because I think it will do me some good. :)

Proverbs 31:11 "The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain." 

Okay, if I acted like I knew what this verse meant, I would be lying. Because the truth is, I'm having a really hard time wrapping my mind around the last phrase. No lack of gain? What does that mean?

Wait, wait. Let's just start with the first section. "The heart of her husband safely trusts her." 

When I am studying scripture, one of the first things I want to do is read different translations of the same verse. The translation above is NKJV (my personal favorite) but lets see what else we can find.

NIV - "Her husband has full confidence in her." NIV is the only thing I could find that was different. The other thing I like to do while studying is get my handy-dandy Strong's Concordance out and look up key words in the verse. Believe it or not, this will help you understand many verses a lot better. In this case, I looked up "heart". And heart in this since is referring to the intellect of the husband. I don't know why that is relevant, I just thought I would throw that out there.

Okay, this verse suggests something HUGE about the Proverbs 31 Woman.

She is trustworthy. When people talk to her, they trust her not to spill their secrets, or tear people down. They trust her to back her words up and always treat people the same way.

*ouch* Does any of this sound familiar? It does for me. I know that I am guilty of at least one of those things every day. So what does it mean to be trustworthy?What are ways we can be trustworthy? Or NOT trustworthy?

Here are some of the areas I think trustworthiness covers. All of these I'm guilty of.
- Not lying, but telling the truth. Duh.
- Not slandering other people, but always building people up. In front of them or behind their back.
- Keeping your promises.
- Matching your walk and talk.
- Following through your commitments instead of not finishing what you start.
- Keeping secrets.

I'm sure there are more, but that's all I can think of for now. So, the obvious step from here would be to talk about how we fail in these areas and what are some practical ways that we can change.

Lying v. Honesty: Your mom comes home. You are annoyed that she is home so early. You haven't gotten much stuff done and you have lolly-gagged like crazy and now, she's home and she is going to ask you what you've been doing? You go in your room to avoid the question. But she asks anyways. "So, what did you do today?" You reply, "Oh, English."

"Anything else?"

"No, just English. It was really hard today, so I didn't get much done." Little does she know that that was a total lie. Today, in English you reviewed antecedents and it was a breeze.

Listen to what the Bible has to say about Liars. Proverbs 19:5b "And he who tells lies will not escape." Wow, creepy verse. Let ponder that. We may get temporary relief for not having to deal with our mom and her rantings, but in the end of times we are going to stand before a holy judge, THE HOLY JUDGE and have to give an account for every word we speak. "But that's hardly even a lie!" Some may say. But God has told us, as Christians (and Proverbs 31 Women) to live holy, set apart and sanctified lives and that means that all lies, big or small should bother us and drive us to repentance. Because God wants to put us on a guilt trip? No. God wants us to become like Him. That established, lets challenge ourselves. Every time we feel like exaggerating the truth or telling little white lies, let think about this verse. Proverbs 19:5. Better yet, lets memorize it. The way we defeat sin in our life is with the word of God (and His Grace of course). Pray that when exaggeration or lies are on your tongue that God would bring this verse to you and stop you. He will. It's annoying when He does that. It's happened to me. But think about it, each time you decide to be truthful, you become more like Christ and that is rewarding!!

I'm feeling as though this may have to be a multi-part post.

Far Above Rubies (Breaking That Down Into Comprehensible, Mind-Sized Pieces So We Don't Just Read Over It and Not Really Understand)

You may have caught on from my earlier posts that I am going to be talking about how we can be P31Ws (Proverbs 31 Women) in our lives, now. Well, I have been doing some studying and I am finding it to be most profitable for myself and I hope it will be for you all too.

I don't know about you, but I would love to be so valued that no amount of money in the world could replace me. That no beautiful gems and stones could make anyone trade me.That my future husband would be continually blessed by me and be proud to have me as his wife. That for years to come people would remember me by the way I loved people and the way I served the Lord. 

Nice to dream about, huh? Sounds like a perfect life - but a little out there. I mean, who is that amazing and valuable? I can assure you that I am not. But this dream, these goals are not entirely out of reach. A godly woman, is valuable. The Bible says it. Check out this verse and really try to think about what it means.

Proverbs 31:10 "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies." I love this verse. This has kinda been a life-long motto for me. When I think about being a woman for the Lord - the first thing that pops into my head is being "far above rubies". I want to be that valued.

ISN'T THAT COOL!!!!!!!!!!! Wait. You haven't caught it yet? Think about it.

Virtuous woman = far above rubies!!!

That is something within our grasp. We serve a God, who, if we walk in His way and seek His face, makes us more and more like Him every day. Virtue is something that we can acquire. I don't just have to dream about being valued like that - I can be valued like that. God shows me how! That just makes me so excited.

"So..." Your asking, "Just how much is a ruby worth? This could be so un-epic if it's like an everyday piece of glass." I have good news for you. Rubies today are not worth as much as they used to be. We have better ways of mining and they are just more ready than they used to be...BUT listen to some interesting facts on how they used to be....and look at these pictures.

They kinda look like rock candy, (Which I haven't had since I was around ten and I remember it tasting a lot like dye.).

 

 

 

 

Okay, not very authentic, but I just think this necklace is BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!

 

 

- Woman who wore rubies were thought to be transformed into an aura of beauty.
- Rubies are the third strongest stone in the world.
- In ancient times, ruby stones were kept under a building foundation, to strengthen its structure.- Rubies are more rare and valuable than a flawless diamond.

And how about this commentary from Answers in Genesis, "Rubies and sapphires have long been part of human history, dating back to Job, an early post-Babel patriarch around 2000 BC.³ Rubies in particular have been prized by monarchs as a symbol of their wealth and power. In ancient Sanskrit the name for rubies meant “queen of precious stones.”"

That....is....valuable.

I'm glad that I have a God who values character more than Riches. Thanks Goodness!!! That's a pretty long post, so it's as far as I'll go for now, but until next time, just think about the value of a virtuous woman and how cool it is that it is available for US with GOD's help!!

(Disclaimer: I want to make sure that everyone gets my point on the value thing. I'm not saying, that if you aren't a P31W you are an everyday brown paper bag. It's just that a woman of virtue have more earthly and heavenly value to anyone than a gem. And no matter what we are, God still LOVES US! which I will get into more in a later post.)

Being a P31W now!

You out a pop-tart in the toaster. DING! Instant breakfast!

You call Verizon and DING! Instant text messaging.

You put on a ring and DING you become a Proverbs 31 Woman......

What....wait, wait. That's not how it works. You're right. It's not. For some reason, I've always had this mental image in my mind of a Proverbs 31 women, who is married and has kids. Is that the only type of Proverbs 31 woman there is? No, I don't think so at all. Being a Proverbs 31 woman is something that God has called us to NOW and TODAY.

I think this thought has slowed me down when it comes to being a P31W now. If I feel like being a godly woman is something that only comes in the future, then it gives me allowance to basically act like I want until then, right?

Wrong.

Although a mother was teaching her son about a woman to be looking for in marriage, I know that the guidelines for all females any age, can be found there. If we are looking for a way to be Godly in our single, no-where-close-to-getting-married and even-further-from-having-kids stage, we don't have to look any further than Proverbs 31. I believe that if we apply all the principles taught in every area of our lives, we will be the woman that God has made us to be; whether we marry or not.

I am going to be posting now and then about my findings from Proverbs 31 and I encourage all the gals out there to take that passage and break it down. Intensely. Really. And ask God, "How can I apply this to my life NOW? What can I do NOW that is going to make me a godly woman?" He will answer and show us. He always does.

Now, don't get discouraged. We will never been the perfect P31W and that's okay. She is a person to model, but we will never be her, completely. It's something we strive for and continue to seek until we die. We serve a good God. I'm so glad that He gives us amazing examples that we will never be like (eg. Himself), because if He didn't, I believe that my pride would become so huge that I would never see the areas I fail in. But I look at Christ, and the P31W and David and Stephen and Mary...and I think, "Wow, I guess I'm not really the shiz." It kinda sets me in my place.

Becoming Childlike.

There is an adorable little boy at our church, Matthew. I'm not sure how old he is, but he's a baby. Prolly one and a half or something.He and his family always sits in the row in front of us.

I have learned some lessons from that little guy. During the sermons on Sunday, Matthew sits in either his father or mother's lap. Sometimes, well often, he gets squirmy and wants to run around, but a lot of the time, I am amazed how content little Matthew seems to be sitting in his parent's arms. He doesn't seem to feel confined or irritated that they hold him close.

One time, Matthew sat on his mother's lap, facing her. He stares up into her face - studying her. I was struck at that moment, by his intense gaze. He looked at her whole face. I'm telling you, he has every pore in her face memorized.

I need to be like Matthew when it comes to my heavenly Father. When was the last time that I threw every distraction aside and dwelt on the beauty of my Father's face, memorizing every characteristic and word about Him. I don't fall on my face enough in worship of the God I serve. You know why I think that? I don't know Him well enough. I haven't fully grasped the beauty of His wonderful face. But every time I see another detail about the way His eyes shines with love for me or I notice a wrinkle in His cheek that can only be from concern and sorrow over my sin, I do fall down in worship.

This verse comes to mind. Mark 10:15 "Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not
receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it."

Faith.

That's what a lot of us are short on, huh?

I remember my dad telling me once about me as a kid. He said that I would jump from a high place into his arms because I knew he would catch me. Now, if asked to jump from anything into my dad's arms, I know I would be too scared. I don't trust that my dad would catch me - not because he has changed, but I have. I now realize that I'm heavier than I used to be, and I know the consequences of what would happen if he dropped me.

I think I'm like that with God often. I fool myself into thinking that God doesn't really know what He is talking about and that He isn't going to catch me. I try to handle situations in my own strength and not His. What a shame. I end up hurting/tiring myself for lack of trust in a perfect omnipotent God.

When I think of being childlike in my faith, I think of Matthew. That child knows his parent's faces like the back of his chubby hand. I believe with all my heart that he would jump from a rooftop into his dad's arms, with no fear, no "what if" thoughts.

What this can look like in my life: 1-Content in my Father's arms - refusing to be distracted by the many "pretty things" in the world. Happy just to be alone with Him. 2-Studying my Father and trying to grasp the infinite magnitude of His holy, gracious, loving, wrathful, jealous...ect. character by being in His Word, listening and praying to Him. 3-Learning to be unafraid to adopt His plan (the WHOLE plan) and not trying to figure things out on my own, but having faith to trust that God does know much more than I do. So just jump; He's going to catch me.

Thanks, Matthew, for being the adorable little boy you are and for teaching me practical lessons. I pray that you will seek God with an intensity no one can match.

Prayer Request..

Could you guys pray for me? I am having some pretty serious back trouble right now. I don't know why, but it is hurting so bad, but I can't remember injuring it or anything. But everything is really uncomfortable and we have company coming in and stuff, which is going to put me out of my bed (not that thats a problem, I don't mind) but it makes it hard not sleeping in your own bed. Yeah, if you guys could pray that it would get better that'd be good. I have stuff coming up like bball games and I'm gonna need that back (pun not intended). And if you have any requests feel free to share. And hopefully, I'll get some MEANINGFUL posts up soon, sorry about that...

I Hate Emotions

Grrrr....

I have a random question.

Have you ever loved something so much that even though there is nothing depressing about it at all, just thinking about that thing can bring you to tears? It just stirs an emotion in you that will make you cry even though it's not sad?

Am I the only one like this? Please tell me I'm not....It's annoying me.

Day 11 - A deceased person you wish you could talk to

Jesse Welch,

It seems like yesterday since the tornado came through. But in only a few weeks it going to be a whole three years.

I'll never forget the last time we talked. You were waiting impatiently for me to finish reading a story in your english book by Edgar Allen Poe. We both loved him! I had never read it before and you made sure that I got to read it. Your mom arrived though and I rushed through the last paragraph. Little did I know that would be the last time you would be at school, or I don't think I would have been reading.

I don't think I've ever really bickered with a guy friend like I did you. What's with that? You were def. one of my closest guy friends but we really just got at each other a lot. Contrasting personalities? Maybe, I don't know. Immaturity? Most likely. I remember snapping at you because you were trying to help me with a science project. I tried to apologize so many times for that. I wish I would have.

No use in lying - when I first met you I thought you were odd and was a little weirded out. But after getting to know you and after we both matured more I found that you were a really nice guy! I wonder if you were still here if we would be great friends. I'd like to think so. We were already starting to hang out more. I remember debating whether to invite you to my birthday party or not. It was going to be a small group of mostly girls and I didn't want you to feel awkward so I never did.

I'm going to graduate in five months! Can you believe it? In November I had a senior party with our class. It was fun, but afterward I cried because I know you would have had a blast with us - probably showing us a magic trick or something. I think at graduation we are going to do something in memory of you. It has to be something special though, so we are thinking about what exactly to do.

I just had a birthday. I'm seventeen. Crazy. You taught me a lot of lessons. In your life and your death. You taught me to love and accept people for who they are (your friendliness to EVERYONE was inspiring) and God showed me to always be ready, because at any time I could leave. Just like you. I've been blessed to live as long as I have and I'll never understand why God would let you and your family die and not me and my family or someone else, but I am truly thankful for every day that I live and want to serve God with every breath I breathe.

I know you are sitting at the feet of Christ. Although I love life, I cannot wait to join you. And when it comes to singing, we'll put that ol' UCA choir to shame - not to mention Salene's...but that's not the point. :)

Thank you for being the special you that you were.

-ash

P.s. I miss your magic tricks. I still do that one with the rubber band. It makes me smile.

Day 10 - Someone I wish I could meet

GEORGE WASHINGTON!!

I don't know what is with those crazy people out there, but there are a ton of people who think that you and the other founding fathers were not Christians, which I think is so silly. There is tons of evidence out there that you were. Actually, I think you were a strong devout Christian. I wish I could sit you down and ask you some questions on live TV, surely that would convince everyone.

Well, no matter what they believe I really respect you. And I am so glad that you helped make our nation what it is. You believed in a government AND God and so do I. They cannot be separated! Thank you for giving your life to America and Christ. I can't wait to meet one day.

A Fellow American,
Ashley Jones

I know, you all think I'm corny, but that came fromt he bottom of my heart so don't laugh...

Day 8 -My Favorite Internet Friend

Hm...well just so you know, I am not on the social networks or anything, so these two people are just peeps I know from their blogs and forums and stuff...

1: Miguel (He has many names: Bof, Bliz, Blizzard of Fire, Mig)

Dear Cuz,
Thanks for always being so nice to me on OYAN. Let me tell ya, if it wasn't for you, I probably wouldn't have had any critiques on my novel. Thanks soooo much for sticking with it and helping me with all my random nautical questions and stuff. I have always known that if I ever needed anyone to talk to or someone to help me I could always come to you. And you have always supported me in my crazy ideas, just encouraging me to follow God's will for me. And your love for God so inspires me (I guess you can't tell exactly thru the computer, but it seems as though you really have a heart for the Lord.) Bravo! Keep serving Christ in everything you do. Keep being involved in things that are trying to make a difference. And DEFINITELY KEEP WRITING! Would I be surprised if I saw a book in Books a Million written by you?...Naw, not at all! :)

A Sister from the Forum,
Ashley Jones


Kyle Cheng:

I anxiously await your blog posts. I love reading them and each one speaks to me specifically. Thank you for making your thoughts on things known and for not being afraid to stand up for what you believe in. You have encouraged me to dive down into a deeper relationship with Christ through journaling. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! You were right! I can already see the work God has been doing in me. Thanks so much for refering me. Please, continue in the faith and continue blogging! You've been an inspiration. Your "laboring" hasn't been in vain.

Your Sister in Christ,
Ashley Jones

WATCH THIS! Trust me...it's worth the time...

Has any place ever changed your life? God used Camp Barnabas to change mine. It is a special needs camp that is serious about sharing the love of Christ with these kids.

Watch these videos...want to come or donate? Contact me and we will work something out. ;)

Want to know what it's all about?




Want to know the benefits for the CIAs?




A good video of just people goofing off...

I got a love letter...

Sometimes "I love you" loses it's meaning. Often it's overused. We pop open a can of Pepsi, look at the tin can and say, "I love you" dramatically. We toss around "I love you" with a romantic interest we've only known for three days. We say "I love you" for a show and to look good. We say it when we often don't mean it.

But today, my hands shake and tears form under my eyes as I read the simple words, "I love you" for the hundredth time. "You are beautiful" are the next words. And "when you look at me, my heart beats" follows that.

My heart overflows with joy at the genuineness of such words. They weren't for show, they aren't overused. Someone wrote them and meant them.

My warm tears fall, staining the page once again. Its wear and tare is showing by now. The page is crinkled and dirty, but I still pull it out to read it again and again. It never losses its meaning and never becomes dry. Each time I read it it makes me just as happy as it did the first time - if not more so!

I hold that letter to my chest and treasure it. I'll never let it go. Never. I hide it in my heart, so when I'm not reading it - I can at least remember what it says.

It's a wonder how these moments of joy can be so quickly turned to sadness. Even after being so full of love - I quickly forget what the words on that precious page said. They slip from my mind. I become discouraged and wonder why I feel so alone.

But I'm lucky. My lover is patient. He finds so special ways to remind me to read His letter again. He gives me hugs or sings a song or randomly pops in my mind. Then the words come flooding back to me. I run into my room and pull that letter out...

I read, "I love you, beloved. I will never leave you or forsake you."

I needed this....

Wow. I needed to hear this so much...



Here is the song if you haven't heard it.

Stoning those dumb idols

Another great Deuteronomy passage. Read and then I'll say some things about it...

Deuteronomy 13:6-11 "⁶ “If your brother, the son of your mother, your son or your daughter, the wife of your bosom, or your friend who is as your own soul, secretly entices you, saying, ‘Let us go and serve other gods,’ which you have not known, neither you nor your fathers, ⁷ of the gods of the people which are all around you, near to you or far off from you, from one end of the earth to the other end of the earth, ⁸ you shall not consent to him or listen to him, nor shall your eye pity him, nor shall you spare him or conceal him; ⁹ but you shall surely kill him; your hand shall be first against him to put him to death, and afterward the hand of all the people. ¹⁰ And you shall stone him with stones until he dies, because he sought to entice you away from the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage. ¹¹ So all Israel shall hear and fear, and not again do such wickedness as this among you." 

I read this the other day and thought of an interesting way we can apply this to our lives. Bare with me.

When it says that people can entice us to other gods - I knew that it was talking about the false gods that people in Canaan and all those other places worshiped and stuff. But then I starting thinking about false "gods" in my life, now. That threaten me - now. Idols. I let myself be enticed into putting things (school, family, friends, chores, media, socialization) further up on my priority list than God. And we know that the Bible says, "Whoever loves their brother...sister....mom or dad more than Me isn't worthy of me. (my version)." I am under the impression that putting those things ahead of God is probably just as offensive to Him as what the Israelites did.

Of course, I know we all get distracted from time to time. But reading this passage - I am reminded to be looking out and watching for distractions so I can tackle them before they become a serious problem.

Whoa...I'm really surprised by the way God wanted them to react. Kill them? Stone them? Wow. That's how serious God was about this. Obviously, we don't have the authority to kill people like back then - they were in a Theocracy and got permission straight from God. But in a figure of speech we can "put to death" those things that drive us away from Christ.

Killing this is hard. I know it is. I've had to do it. But how can we kill those things that are trying to take God's place on the throne of our hearts? I think these verses sum it really well. James 4:7-8 "Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. "

I have this habit of being in a bad situation or finding myself in sin and saying, "Oh no! What do I do?" then panicking. Really stupid. But when we rest in the Lord and REALLY not just kinda....but REALLY pour ourselves into the Word to find help - we are helped. Those giant idols start to crumble and God grabs our hearts again. Resisting the devil - is as easy as diving in the Word and begging for God for help. We just don't realize that.

I love the last part of verse ten. " And you shall stone him with stones until he dies, because he sought to entice you away from the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage."

 I could say much about that verse, but I'll let it gives it's own message. It just makes me wonder why I let those "dumb idols" creep in anyways.

Okay, now I am going to bounce back a little. A verse at the beginning of the chapter said this. It was talking about the same thing, but was only slightly different from the passage above. It said.. "you shall not listen to the words of that prophet or that dreamer of dreams, for the LORD your God is testing you to know whether you love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul."

*gulp* This verse scares me. I forget that trials that come int his life ARE IN FACT a test of our faith and love for Christ. Next time I say, " I love God" I am going to remember this verse.

So questions for the day. What are the gods in our life? And how do we go about stoning them? 

Dueteronomy 10:12-22

I love this old testament verse. I encourage you to read it...and then better yet, go to the Bible and read the surrounding verses to get the context.


¹² “And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, ¹³ and to keep the commandments of the LORD and His statutes which I command you today for your good? ¹⁴ Indeed heaven and the highest heavens belong to the LORD your God, also the earth with all that is in it. ¹⁵ The LORD delighted only in your fathers, to love them; and He chose their descendants after them, you above all peoples, as it is this day. ¹⁶ Therefore circumcise the foreskin of your heart, and be stiff-necked no longer. ¹⁷ For the LORD your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality nor takes a bribe. ¹⁸ He administers justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the stranger, giving him food and clothing. ¹⁹ Therefore love the stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt. ²⁰ You shall fear the LORD your God; you shall serve Him, and to Him you shall hold fast, and take oaths in His name. ²¹ He is your praise, and He is your God, who has done for you these great and awesome things which your eyes have seen. ²² Your fathers went down to Egypt with seventy persons, and now the LORD your God has made you as the stars of heaven in multitude.

New Year's Resolutions

Ah! I love these. I love making personal goals and trying to accomplish them.

What is your New Year's Resolution. Or put this way - what things do you expect to accomplish (or should I say, expect God to accomplish - see last post.) this year?

I'm a dreamer so I have quite a few. Wanna hear them? Feel free to ask me how I'm doing. I'll need it.
-I'm going gluten free
-and sugar free (length for these two things is at least two months).
-I want to revise both novels and look into publishing
-learn giutar
-get lifeguard certified
-learn djembe
-then  I have some personal goals regarding my devotional stuff.

SHARE YOURS TOO!!!

Reflect and Expect

Happy New Year! Can you believe that it is 2011 already?

I look back on this past year. I am so happy. Wanna know why? Because I am not the same person I was a year ago. And that person wasn't the same as the person before that. God is constantly changing and working in my life. Yeah, sometimes I have better weeks than others but I am on my way to becoming more Christlike as I go on.

Time has flown by. Today, I registered for an ACT test and choose the colleges to send my scores to. I spent a while on the internet looking at scholarships I can apply for. I turn seventeen in two weeks. I'm graduating in 5 months! Where has time gone?

The future is intimidating. I can't decide if I'm excited or sad. I guess it's a little of both. Part of me feels crazy and ready for the adventures life brings, but the other part of me feels like a lost boy in Neverland - determined not to grow up. Every step brings me closer to an eternity with Christ. Although, the thought is frightening, I AM excited about that. And every trial is just another chance to reach up and hold on tighter to my Father's hand. Yes, I am scared, but excitement trumps.

Lots of great things have happened this year! I can't begin to explain the ways. Christ is near - that is certain.  I know that God has many different ways of teaching His children, but I want to share with y'all how He has taught me.

I have learned to expect big things from God.

Not little.

Big.

HUGE!

Why?

We serve a big, huge, strong and powerful God. The "earth is His footstool". He has taught me that it is okay to ask the impossible of Him. No, I've never seen something "supernatural" - for lack of a better word - before. He hasn't made me turn invisible or anything like that. But things that I THOUGHT were impossible and too much to ask He has done.

For example - I have had trouble with lust. I had a lust problem and I just couldn't get over it. I tried a lot of times to get rid of it, but it would never go away...it felt like it would just get worse. Well, I had to literally beg the Lord mulitple times to take it away. I thought it would never happen. It has. Granted, I do fall back into it now and again, but overall, God has taken that struggle away from me. He has showed me, "Ashley, you don't need a man to complete you. As for now, you ARE complete - in ME! I can satisfiy you. Look no further."

I expected my merciful God to come to my aid and He did. I expect God to rush to my side when temptations arise - and He will. I expect God to be there when I fall and wipe my tears away and to give me strength when I am weak. And He will.

Why do we fool ourselves into thinking that we have to figure stuff out by ourselves? Why do I? I act like God just coaches from the sidelines and I have to score all by myself. Noooo, quite the contrary.

Just today I was reminded to be in prayer about college. For some WEIRD reason I was under the impression that I had to figure every thing out by myself. That no one was going to show me so I just had to make a decision. I forgot. God is going to show me. How? Who knows! He has some seriuosly strange ways...but I remembered that I have to expect Him to show me and He will show me.

As I have grown in my relatinoship with Christ, He has taught me to expect more of Him. As I begin to understand God more for who He is and what His promises mean, I believe all the more that He is in control and that He will follow through.

I ask myself a few questions this New Year. In what areas am I not expecting God to take care of? What things do I feel like I have to take of? In what areas am I expecting defeat? What things do I need to surrender to Christ? What do I expect God to accomplish in the New Year? What do I expect to learn?

Expect big things from God and He will teach you to trust Him and expect more and more. And the good thing is - He doesn't disappoint. ;)

Day 7 - My dreams

Dear Dreams,

You are both a curse and a blessing. It is you that has me confused about what God wants me to do with my life. You invade my thoughts and terrorize me. Yet, you motivate me. You confuse me, but give me something to aim for. Sometimes I wish you weren't there, but I know if you weren't that I would live a totally passionless life. And passion is what drives me on from day to day. Passion about what I could do for God and stuff.

Sometimes you have me running in circles, completely unfocused. Yet other times, I know exactly what I'm shooting for because of you and end up doing something productive.

It is very hard to ignore you. I want to pursue you, but I must ask myself what God would want of me. Not myself. I do hope that you are part of God's plans but you never know where He could have me. He sometimes has some really random plans. But it's an adventure. Let's see where it takes us.

Your dreamer,
Ashley

Day 6 - Stranger

Hi Stranger,
I'm not sure exactly what to say to someone I have never met before. I know you are out there somewhere and if there is one thing I think you should know, it's that I care about you and so does the Lord. Jesus Christ is the one Lord and He is worth pursuing. He definitely changed me a lot. I hope you are doing great, and I wonder if you will continue to be a stranger, or maybe we will come in contact one day? Who knows?
 -Ashley 

Day 5- Future Spouse

Dear Unknown Future Spouse,

Do I know you? Are you currently in my life or are you some person that I have never even met before? It's funny to think about really. I wonder if you are going to be one of those people who is going to be hard to talk to at first or if you are going to be a really loud talkative guy. I kinda picture myself with a quieter guy but, hey, WHO KNOWS! I am really looking forward to what God has for us. I know that the person He is preparing for me is going to be ultra special! ULTRA! Just know, I already think so highly of you and it's possible that I have never even seen your face. >.>

Maybe this is corny, but I did am exercise (And the Bride Wore White) where I had to make a list of the things I want to see in you. Scared? Should be. Ha ha, just kidding. I know that if I aim at absolutely nothing, I'll hit it. So I want to know exactly what I want and what God's version of a Biblical husband is. So goes for me. I have to aim high. My model is the Proverbs 31 woman. I'll never be like her, but I want to.

I won't lie, there are some times when it is really hard to stay emotionally, physically and spiritually pure. Sometimes I wonder if I'm ever going to make it. I know I can with the Lord and I hope you are trying to remain pure too.

I hope that when we marry that we will be so in love. I hate seeing the frumpy couples that never show affection or anything. They don't seem happy that they are married. I NEVER want that to happen to us. I hope we are always going to be head over heals in love with each other. Don't get me wrong. I know that love isn't always based on gushy feelings. In fact, part of marriage is loving and respecting one another - even when it's hard. I look forward to that believe it or not. I'm looking forward to those times when I'm going to really have to deny myself in order to care for your needs above mine. Hard? Yes. Rewarding? Undoubtedly. I know that through our marriage God will mold us more and more into His image if we keep Him and the other above ourselves. There is no better way to grow closer to one another than through really learning to be like Christ and loving and glorifying Him more whole-heartedly.

Random times you will pop into my head. Not knowing who you are, I just say a prayer for you. Hoping that at that moment you are walking in the light and serving God, denying yourself and empowered by our Father's strength.

I really cannot wait. I hope we are best friends and have a blast together. I think we will.

Your girl,
Ashley

For what?

What am I doing? I am appalled at my ability to be able to live my life without giving thought to others' pain. I am such a selfish person. I have thought about me and I all the time. I haven't cared to invest in my neighbors or the people at the Dollar General or even my friends like I should.

God, forgive me for being so complacent. Forgive me for thinking that Holy Joe at church should be the one to witness. What am I doing? Why am I wasting my time? If I am not here to love people and care for their needs, serving my God, WHY AM I HERE? To be a facebook addict? To write great books? To sing? To play sports? To get a career? Those things are going to pass away.




God, I've ignored your commandment to witness to others. I've blown it off. I haven't regarded Your Word. I should be punished for my selfish protection of the best news in the world. The news that YOU love ME AND THEM. The news that can save the world. I have it! It's in my possession. God, I'm afraid that I am an unworthy steward of such a possession!

The pain out there. If I listen, I can almost hear them crying. I can almost hear people asking "Why?". I can imagine people questioning me, wondering why the heck I didn't share You with them. Wondering why they are here and wishing they knew the purpose of their lives.

Every person, has experienced some amount of pain. Everyone.Some worse than others. I know that you are the healing to that pain. I am experiencing pain at this moment. You know the whole and You are the healing and the help. Where does my help come from? You God!

And I selfishly hoard the remedy to our pain. I still go through hard times, but I can endure the pain because I know you and that makes all the difference in the world.

God help me to be more outspoken. To love. to tell. To care. To heal. To mend. To listen. To be. To help. To encourage. To inspire.

What can I do?

Your story. A cry for the broken.

I got an idea. I can't tell you guys what it is yet. Sorry, but it is about encouraging people to help others with their pain. I need your help, so I can write this thing. I want you guys to respond to this question in the comments. Please leave something, even if it is small.

Here are some questions that I need you guys to answer and feel FREE to do it ananymously - actually, I encourage you too. It's not about who says what. I need it to give me ideas about what people struggle with from day to day. As weird as this sounds, please give me a story of pain from your life.

1: What has happened in your life that has been painful? (unfaithfulness, betrayal, death...ect.)

2: What things do you find yourself giving in too for comfort? God? Cutting? Friends? Media? ect?

3: What sins do you struggle with?

4: Is there anything that you feel like overcomes you?

5: Share a story of a person or thing that has helped you, encouraged you or changed your life? What was it and why did it help so much?

6: Name some ways that you find yourself helping other people in pain.

7: Is there a Bible verse that you find comforting in painful times? Please share.

8: How do you feel people reacting to you? With love, and accepting? Or with discomfort and awkwardness?

9: Be open about yourself. What do feel like people (namely Christians) feel about you?

10: Have you ever felt like you needed help, but no one was there to help you? Please share.

I KNOW that these are personal questions, but bare with me, you guys. If I could figure out how to do this....

Day 5 - Sibling

Ok, sorry, I know I'm behind really bad. I am trying to post but I just never have the TIME! GRRR!

Dear Becca,
Wow, where do I even begin? You are the greatest sister I could ever ask for. I know we have had our fights and differences but you have always been there for me.I know that you feel like you have to protect me and look out for me. That means so much to me. I hope you never stop that. It makes me feel like I really have some one who cares about exactly how I'm feeling and what I want and my needs. I love how you and I are so random together. We just stare in each others eyes and say something really dumb and then bust out laughing. Sometimes I need those random laughs more than you know. I love wearing your clothes. They are always so much better than mine.

You always encourage me so much sis! You show me things form different angles and help me see. You let me know when I'm lacking in an area so I can get better. I get prideful at times so I really need those reminders.

I'm sorry when I am sometime annoying and don't treat you with the respect I ought to. You are so precious to be with but sometimes I just forget that.Thanks for being so patient with me and loving me anyways.

Thanks for always paying for me. Dude, I for-real owe you so much money. I need to get better at paying you back. Mmmm, all the milk-shakes and fries. A picture of health.

Thanks for being an encouragement in the Lord. I pray for you all the time. I hope that you grow up to be a Proverbs 31 woman. Somehow, I know you will be. Just follow the Lord with all your heart. Like the man who sold everything to buy the one valuable pearl, surrender your  life to Christ.

I love you.

-Ashy
*kissy*

Day 3 -Meh Parents

Dear Mommy and Daddy,

Whoo, I'll tell ya. We have been through a lot together. Hard times, good times, fun times, boring times, strange times and well....I'll leave it at that. Lol. I know I'm lucky because I can truly call my parents two of my very very good friends. Thank you both so much for teaching me to walk in the Lord and wanting what God wants for me. I owe you guys for never completely squashing all my crazy ideas and dreams. I always have some new,crazy idea and you guys just nod and say, "That's cool", wondering what on earth possessed me to embrace such an endeavor. Ya'll never say, "That's a dumb idea." or "Why the HECK would you want to do THAT?" You guys have been real patient with me and for that I am thankful. You guys have driven me to tim-buck-too to do the things I want to do and have poured gobs of time and money and miles into things like my braces, singing, piano, drama, volunteering, and camp barnabas, soccer, basketball and many more things. Thanks for the late night convos, pushing me to my fullest capacity, and reminding me to always seek the Lord. I love spending time with you two and being goof-balls together. I know it makes you guys sad that I'm growing up and might move away soon, but trust me, I'll always come back to be with you guys! Love you both sooo sooo much!

Yo Daughter,
Ashley

<---Look left.

Hi. I have a poll. Please vote. I've had around forty hits in the last few days....ermm...and six votes? Lol. I'm going to be posting soon. I'm sorry, I've had really long days the past while. Seriously, Tuesday I was gone for fourteen hours. O.o And ever time I'm home I'm cramming school or something. I'll be back soon. Hopefully tonight. In the meantime, feel free to do a little voting.

Ciao!

Day 2 - My Crush?

I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay....going away-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay...Lol gotta love David Archuletta.

This is dumb.

My Beloved, Adored, Cherished, Prized, and Dear Crush,
Can you even imagine how much you mean to me? Probably not, you'd have to have one heck of an imagination which I know you do not possess - not like me anyways. I don't even know your name, but every time I get around you I can't even say anything and most of the time I end up dropping my books in front of you and then I get embarrassed because you see my multiple books on Cereology (study of crop circles) and give me strange looks, but you know what? I know what those looks mean. They say to me, "You know? I think you are weird and the fact that you study Cereology is weird and you have warts on your nose, but I love you. I love you anyways." And then my heart is glad because I know. The other day when you were walking by you bumped into me and I KNOW you did it on purpose. You can't hide from me! i know you too well.....blah blah blah...

Haha! Luckily, I don't have a crush. I'm not making fun of the people who do, I just think %80 of crushes are weird because most times they are based on the stuff that doesn't matter instead of how much you know a guy. Comprendas?

At this stage in my life, the LAST thing that needs to happen to me is a serious crush. I don't need that at all. I find them very distracting. Last time I had a crush it really kept my mind off of what needed to be done and somewhere in la-la land thinking about that crush (who I hardly ever talked to....so dumb), which ended up dying down and then becoming none existent. Therefore, completely WASTING MY TIME! I know we are all humans and stuff so it is natural to be distracted by crushes (of the opposite sex, btw) but when you are young...13-18 and the Lord isn't opening any doors for you, then don't go looking for some guy/girl to have a crush on and having these silly "high-school-relationships". They are pointless and really take the focus off the joy of serving Christ and SINGLENESS! Yay!

Okay, I'm rambling really bad. (Sorry LoVizzle I'm not using my new motto, "Think and gather...then write.") I'm not condemning crushes. I'm just saying that they can be detrimental to one's spiritual growth and accomplishments. So if you have this nasty, pointless crush that just won't go away then I would encourage you to give it to God. I've had to do that so many times, because I don't want to be distracted when the time is not right for me to be moving toward a marriage or anything. I've found when I give things to the Lord and say, "God, I'm serious this time I really don't want this!" that He really does help me. Until God gives you super-natural ability to juggle both a guy and serving Him, which I believe is around marrying age, then just stick with serving the Lord because it is near impossible to do both (in my experience anyways). One will get the better treatment and because of our fallen nature, most times it's the crush. God is so cool, when I finally give those crushes over to Him, He relieves me and I have such a better time serving Christ, others, I'm more focused and have more purpose. Guys are cute but God's better. ;)

Sorry, I didn't mean to talk that long and I hope I didn't sound like I was bossing everyone around. It's just a warning, because I know I have wasted tons of energy trying to look right, act right and be cute or what-not around so and so and I regret it.   
 

Day 1 -Your Best Friend

Okay I will write a letter to my best friend. An maaybe a few other of my really good friends.


Carlee (a.k.a carwee, carwiki, carkiwi, carlos, carcahwee/lee, carkeys, cark, cars, butt, sis),

I never thought that I could be such good friends with someone so different from me. We're white and black, left and right, day and night. Ya know? You are way more high-strung and not reserved. Me, on the other hand, am more laid back and can be reserved around certain people. I love it. I think we balance each other pretty good, don't you?

I'm so happy to call you my best friend. There is no one I would rather spend my time with. I can be me around you. I feel like I never have to hold anything back with you. Its just me. I'm so glad that we can have little arguments but then work it out. I think it has really made us better friends. If you and I hadn't had our arguments I don't think I would know as much about you.

One thing I love about you is your sensitive personality. I love how you seem to feel other people and get chill bumps over a sad song. I love you have a heart to see people come to know Christ, the way you get fired up about politics and would be the first person to club someone if they said something mean about me. Lol.
I love laughing with you! I'm just saying! I can't be around you without running to the bathroom. Your sense of humor kills me. And you never get mad at me. Dude, for real! I have done some awful stuff before and I'm amazed at how you let things roll of your back like you do.

I really believe that I have grown so much with you as my best friend. I imagine us as old old ladies watching our kids play in the back yard. I hope with all my heart that you and I aren't going to stop being friends. You are the most amazing friend I could ever have and I wouldn't trade you for anybody.

*gives flying tackle hug while squealing*

Your Bestie,
Ashwee

Wow, that was really fun...I think I am going to write a letter also to two other people that I'm pretty close to.

Hope,
Girl, I haven't known you very long, but I just want you to know how happy I am that you and I met. Seriously, it hasn't been a year and your emails have been such an encouragement to me. You are a Godly young lady and I love spending time with you. You live sooooo far away. I hate it. I hope we continue to be friends and grow in the Lord together.  You are so mature in your walk with the Lord for your age. Can't wait for Youth Conference!
Love you, Hopie

Chelsea,
A song reminds me of you and me. "I've hear it said that people come int our lives. For a reason. Bringing something we must learn and we are lead to those who help us most to grow if we let them and help them in return." Lol. I don't know if it goes the same for you, but I'm always sooo inspired by the way you jump and tackle things. You want to sing and do theater so you pour your life into becoming that. That is so cool. I need more focused like that. And being with you has inspired me to be better. I know I'm the singer I am because I wanted to be like you. :) Thanks for being someone to laugh with, sing with, and talk about theater "drama" with. Lol. I love you bunches!